Didn't have to work tonight

I didn't have to work tonight, and I really needed the time. I work tomorrow and I don't work Monday or Tuesday.

I wasn't meant to live like this. I was meant to move into a new house and not worry about things.

Tuesday I have orientation at McDonalds.

I want to work from 6 to 10 at McDonalds and 11 to early morning at McDonalds. I think I could make my $100 a day that way.

I have an interview with Americorps on Tuesday. It sounds like a very positive thing. I would get $800 a month and then I'd have to do something else.

How I wish I could have started on something, gone to Career Services at my University, something back in August or September. There's a reason why I didn't.

How I need something artistic to come from this world that I lived in and around. How I need that.

Tony Snow did die of colon cancer and he died on the anniversary of my mother's death. If she had had a colonscopy, she'd be here today. She would be here, right now, and I know life would be better. She would have helped me know what to do in life.

She called things she didn't know the name of "doomey-flotchets." She was beautiful.

I hope I am "putting out" a positive light, in spite of the hell I'm going through---I hope that I'm not appearing an idiot or fool.

Cindy