I put up another post on Craigslist. It was about "Josh." Nothing extremely revealing, but a bit mysterious as someone emailed me and asked what he said and would I like to get some things off my chest.
I kind of like that it has a sense of mystery about it. That's what I want. It will keep people reading, I hope.
I said a couple of things, at two different times, that I feel changed the course of history with "Josh" and me. I know it can't be changed and we can't go back---I know this---so very, very well, yet it doesn't help a lot. I just feel it changed the course of history, but I suppose he's been a very black/white, yes/no, person and if he had been able to talk to me instead of completely pushing me away, he might have really been the right person for me. I knew that he wasn't thinking outside himself when he did a couple of things. I knew that wasn't a great person who could just go on what the other person said without asking questions. I knew that at the time. Yet, at the time, it didn't hurt any less knowing that.
Cindy
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